The Only Validation That Matters: When Someone Actually Pays

When I was considering the leap from school employee to entrepreneur, I talked to a lot of people about my ideas. Friends. Former colleagues. People in my network. And you know what? They were overwhelmingly supportive.

“That’s a great idea.” “You should totally do this.” “Schools definitely need that.”

It felt good. Validating, even. I took all that encouragement as evidence that I was onto something real.

Here’s what I’ve learned since: encouragement is not validation. Not even close.

The Encouragement Trap

When you’re starting out, it’s easy to mistake activity for traction. People sign up for your free webinar. You get likes and comments on LinkedIn. Former colleagues want to grab coffee and “pick your brain.” Someone shares your post. Another person says they’ll “definitely reach out when they have budget.”

All of this feels like progress. It feels like the market is telling you something.

But none of it is validation. It’s just noise.

The only validation that actually matters is when someone pays you. Upfront. Real money. For the thing you’re selling.

Why This Distinction Matters

I’m not saying encouragement is worthless. It’s nice to hear. It can keep you going on hard days. But it can also lead you down a dangerous path where you spend months (or years) refining an idea that nobody will actually buy.

People are generous with encouragement because it costs them nothing. Telling someone “that’s a great idea” is easy. It makes them feel good, it makes you feel good, and nobody has to make a hard decision.

But when you ask someone to pay, everything changes. Now they have to weigh your offering against other priorities. They have to justify the expense. They have to believe that what you’re providing is worth more than the money in their pocket.

That’s a completely different calculation than “does this sound like a neat idea?”

The Hard Truth

Here’s what I wish someone had told me earlier: the only real test of whether your idea has legs is whether people will pay for it. Not whether they’ll attend a free event. Not whether they’ll engage with your content. Not whether they’ll say nice things when you describe it.

Will they open their wallet?

If they won’t, you don’t have a business. You have a hobby that people find interesting.

What This Means Practically

I’m not suggesting you need to have everything figured out before you ask for money. But I am suggesting that you test your assumptions with actual transactions as early as possible.

Instead of building out a full course and then seeing if anyone buys it, sell it first. See if anyone will put money down before you’ve created it. If they will, you’ve got validation. If they won’t, you’ve just saved yourself months of work on something the market doesn’t want.

Instead of offering free consultations to “build relationships,” quote a price. The people who say yes are your real market. The people who say “let’s stay in touch” were never going to buy anyway.

This feels uncomfortable, especially for those of us who spent decades in education where talking about money was almost taboo. But discomfort is part of the transition. You’re in business now. And businesses need paying customers, not just fans.

The Question Worth Asking

If you’re in the early stages of this journey, or even if you’ve been at it for a while, ask yourself honestly: How much of what I’m calling “traction” is actually just encouragement?

Are people paying you? Or are they just cheering you on?

Both have value. But only one keeps the lights on.